GBP Chapter 776 Method
Chapter 776 Method
“Yes.” Lu Jiangting gave a bitter smile and said, “My guilt towards Jianjun was my obsession. However, after those who should have gone to jail went to jail and those who should have left left, that obsession disappeared.”
He remembered that time in front of Wang Jianjun's grave, when he tasted the bitterness of death.
Old Wang beat him up and he finally realized what was happening.
Doctor: "So you have a new obsession now?"
Lu Jiangting paused for a moment, then nodded slightly.
"I guess so. Yuyao and I were childhood sweethearts and loved each other for many years... I feel... I feel that our relationship shouldn't have ended like this."
The doctor silently wrote it down.
Lu Jiangting felt a lump in his throat and his eyes reddened.
"There are too many misunderstandings between us. Since they are misunderstandings, then let's just clear them up, right?"
"This..." The doctor smiled but did not answer.
It's probably best to clarify the misunderstanding; it depends on the situation.
If it doesn't lead to an irreversible situation, then it's still possible.
But if the situation has already become irreversible, how can we go back to the beginning?
Lu Jiangting clenched his fists, tears welling up in his eyes.
"I didn't betray her. I love him. We've come this far only because of too many misunderstandings. I can't understand it, and I'm not reconciled."
He told the public that he had let go of the past, would not disturb Yu Yao's peaceful life, and even wished her well.
But here, he dares to speak out his innermost thoughts.
The doctor couldn't help but smile after hearing this.
As he wrote on the medical record, he said, "I remember you said that she was already married and had children, two of them."
Lu Jiangting took a deep breath, feeling uneasy, but still nodded, "Yes, but I'm still not reconciled. I don't think we should be like this."
The doctor looked surprised, then smiled faintly and said, "Yes, I understand you."
But I don't agree with him. Of course, I can't say this to him; it wouldn't make a difference anyway.
For patients with mental illnesses, you need to acknowledge and understand them before they will open up and tell you the truth.
If you go against him, he will become resistant and stop trusting you.
That would increase the difficulty of treatment.
"What are your plans?" the doctor asked him.
Lu Jiangting said, "In my illusion, the child finally grew up, and I used my connections to arrange a future for him."
"Hmm, that's good. So, your obsession with your friends in the dream should also disappear?"
Lu Jiangting paused for a moment, then said, "It should be soon, because I told myself before that raising Wang Chenchen would be repaying Jianjun's kindness. Now that Wang Chenchen has grown up, I've arranged a job for him, and I should bring Yuyao and her daughter back later."
"Oh, that makes sense. So, did you bring him back?"
Lu Jiangting shook his head.
The doctor was surprised. "No? Why is that? Have we encountered a new problem?"
"No, in this dream I was sending Wang Chenchen to work, and what happened after that was just my guess, or of course, my thoughts in the dream."
The doctor seemed to understand.
"Your current obsession stems from regret, because you and your childhood sweetheart Yuyao never had a happy ending. Now that you have finally fulfilled your promise to your friend, you want to spend the rest of your life making amends to your wife and daughter."
Lu Jiangting nodded hastily, "Yes, I think that once I see the misunderstanding between me and Yuyao cleared up, and once I see myself living out my life with them, my obsession will disappear, and my illness should be cured."
"Hmm, what you said makes sense. But have you considered the possibility that what you see might not be the ending you expect?"
Lu Jiangting's face stiffened. "What do you mean?"
“I’ve recorded the scenes from each of your dreams. It seems that your relationship with her is not good. You’ve made Fang Qing and her child suffer a lot. What if she doesn’t forgive you?”
Lu Jiangting's expression cracked inch by inch on his face, as if it would shatter at any moment.
The doctor noticed something was wrong with him, cursed himself for saying the wrong thing, and hurriedly tried to make amends.
“I just think it’s possible, but you’ve been together for so many years and your child is so grown up, how could you possibly get a divorce? If you just turn back and clear up the misunderstanding with her, she will forgive you for the sake of the child.”
Lu Jiangting's eyes moved slightly; finally, there was a living breath in them.
He forced a weak smile and tried to comfort himself, saying, "Yes, Yuyao will definitely forgive me. She's a traditional woman, and the children are all grown up; she won't bring up divorce again."
A few years ago, Yuyao brought up divorce, and it even went to Lao Xu's place.
Old Xu scolded both him and Fang Qing. He was also punished by writing a self-criticism, being put on the criticism list, receiving a warning, and having his bonus deducted, all to appease Yu Yao.
But he didn't agree to a divorce, and Lao Xu wouldn't let them divorce either, feeling it was shameful.
Knowing she couldn't get a divorce, Yuyao never bothered with the divorce again.
She didn't leave him when he was young, so how could she possibly leave him now that he's old?
Yes, yes, they can't get a divorce, they definitely won't.
Doctor, "So what are your thoughts now?"
Lu Jiangting said, "I want to deliberately stimulate myself to induce hallucinations."
The doctor was surprised, "Active stimulation?"
"Yes, I want to see the ending as soon as possible."
The doctor was surprised for a long time.
No, didn't you say a few months ago that you didn't want to see hallucinations anymore? Because of that, you didn't see Ms. Lin for several months. Why are you suddenly trying to provoke her again?
The doctor was somewhat speechless, but ultimately nodded in agreement, "That's not impossible, but remember, if anything unusual happens, you must immediately stop this dangerous activity and come to me."
"Well, but I can't stimulate hallucinations anymore."
"How to say?"
"I see that Wang Chenchen rarely dreams anymore. I want to see Yu Yao, but I can't see Yu Yao now."
Why can't I see him?
“She moved. She now lives in an upscale neighborhood with guards at the entrance, so I can’t get in.”
doctor:"……"
"She has changed her workplace, and there are more security guards there now."
The doctor was amused. "Well, even if you come to me, there's nothing I can do. If you can't even see me, I certainly can't either."
"I know, I just want to ask you if there's any way to actively provoke me."
Doctor: "Me?"
"Yes, you used medical means to stimulate me."
The doctor was speechless, thinking to himself that what he was saying was like a fantasy, far beyond his comprehension.
Did medical means drive him insane?
He really hadn't thought about it.
"Remember this and think about it."
Lu Jiangting nodded and said, "Alright, I'll come see you again in a few days."
"Okay." The doctor handed him a prescription and said, "I've prescribed some medicine for you. Take it and continue taking it."
"Well, thank you."
……
[I used different writing styles for the protagonist's past and present lives, one realistic and one idealized. The characters in the present life, such as Yuyao, Xiaotong, and Xiaofen, are written in a more idealized way. However, when writing about Yuyao's past life, I took more realistic considerations into account; she was just an ordinary person born in the 1960s, and it was very difficult for her to get a divorce.]
Look at the older generation around you, at least my own grandparents' generation, my parents' generation, all my relatives... there really wasn't a single divorced couple, whether they were doing well or not. Even now, many men sigh and envy their parents' generation's love, where marriage was for life (they believe that it was because of their pure and simple love that they didn't divorce).
However, I believe that their lives, which they endured hardship and sacrificed themselves for, should not be forgotten or glorified.
From today's perspective, they seem incredibly foolish and ignorant; you might even say they deserved their miserable lives. But if we go back to that era, (given the constraints of society, public opinion, and thought) we would realize that they truly had very few choices.